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  • Posted on June 30, 2014 at 10:45PM 67,278 notes

    kat-howard:

    dbvictoria:

    Shakespearean insults, with cats.

    7 more here.

    I did not realize how very perfect cats were at delivering Shakespeare’s insults until now.

    Permalink

    Posted on June 16, 2014 at 10:38PM 1,211 notes

    erikkwakkel:

    Loosing yourself in a labyrinth

    Here is something special I happened upon by coincidence today. These unique drawings are found in a handwritten book from 1611 produced by Nicolas de Rély, a monk from Corbie. We know little about the author and the book is relatively unknown in scholarship, which is kind of amazing considering its topic: a study of medieval labyrinths. These large objects were mazes of up to 40 feet in diameter, built into the floor of cathedrals of twelfth and thirteenth-century Europe (see Chartres Cathedral, lower image). Church visitors, which included a lot of pilgrims, had to undertake a journey to its centre - the latter on their knees, by means of repentance. The labyrinth is also an intellectual exercise, of creating an object of perfect harmony, of balance and calculation, like the Gothic cathedrals which housed them. The monk in the early 17th century was so fascinated by them that he devoted a study to their shapes and routes, replicating them in detail: what a beautiful way to loose yourself!

    Pic: Amiens, Bibliothèque municipale, MS 405 (dated 1611). More images and some more information here. More information of labyrinths here and in this PDF. More about the Amiens labyrinth here.

    (via kat-howard)

    Permalink

    Well, YOU Gave Her To Me!

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on November 25, 2013 at 10:47AM 

    Adam was hard at work doing whatever there is to do in a garden where there are no weeds to pull or dead limbs to cut off, when Eve brought him a mid-morning snack.

    "Got something for you, dear." Eve held the fruit behind her and smiled coyly. "This fruit is brain food." She held out the produce to him.

    "Looks enticing," he said, "Not to mention familiar. If I’m not mistaken, that’s fruit from the tree of the knowledge etc. You didn’t eat that stuff, did you? I told you what God said."

    "Well, it was like this," Eve gushed past her conscience. "I was just letting myself get lost in the garden, when this snake in the grass started talking to me. He said we misunderstood God. We won’t die; we’ll be self-actualized. So I ate one, and I realized I am strong, I am invincible, I am WOMAN!" Eve stopped on the verge of breaking into song. She stepped forward with a messianic air, holding forth the fruit as if it were a trident. "Take and eat; feed the divine spark within you. Your relationship with God will never be the same again!"

    Adam chose to follow the crowd. With fruit juice coursing down his cheeks, he blurted out his first impression. “You need to get some clothes on, Woman!”

    Eve turned apple-colored and did the caught-in-the-buff dance. Adam felt a familiar stirring and realized the pot was being closely watched. He ducked behing a conveniently located tree.

    Guilt set in.

    We’ve got to cover this up,” Adam announced.

    "I know," giggled Eve. "You can’t walk around sticking out like that!"

    "You’ve got a good point there -two, as a matter of fact- but what I mean is, God’s going to know something’s up. Let’s decide what to do while we sew some fig leaves together.

    Just as today, the man scratched out a design and the woman did the tailoring. (I will here avoid reference to “turning over a new leaf.”)

    The sun was plummeting toward the horizon, the temperature was lowering, and Adam and Eve, looking like the Jolly Green Giant, trotted off into the woods to avoid God.

    Right on time, God showed up at the usual meeting place. Adam and Eve seemed to be running a little behind. This was unusual, as neither of them had much to do to get ready. Their birthday suit was their Sunday best. They were usually waiting for prayer-meeting to start.

    God knowing all things, knew Adam’s precise location -second tree to the right and straight on toward morning -and also that the trio had a fourth for bridge, namely that old snake in the grass, Satan. God proffered a further invitation. “Hey Adam! Where are you?”

    Adam strolled into the field with affected nonchalance, followed by Eve with blistered hands folded behind her. The snake stood up and leaned against a tree.

    God started conversation. “What’s up with the suits?” He queried.

    "We decided public nudity was unbecoming for people of our stature in the community," Adam stated haughtily.

    "Who told you you were naked?" asked God.

    Adam realized he’d exposed himself, so he tried bluffing. “We’re your peers now, God. That’s what the guarrantee said on the apple.”

    "You ate the apple then?" One could hear God arching His eyebrows.

    Adam passed the buck cleanly. “That Woman you gave me picked one up at the market for dinner. I ate what was served me.”

    God turned to Eve. “So?” The arched brows were bending the atmosphere.

    "There was this snake there hawking them, and he talked me into it."

    The snake was now prostrate before God. He had no slick answers. God’s eyebrows dropped on the snake. “Crawl and eat dust, dragon. The pain you’ll cause man is nothing compared to what you’ll get from the Son of Mna. Woman, you’ll get pain, too; but your pain will result in new life. Look to your husband for your needs and instructions.” He fixed His voice on Adam. “Adam, since you listened to your wife instead of me, and took from the ground what wasn’t yours to eat, you’re going to have to fight the ground for your food. Unless you like thorns and thistles. By the way -I won’t do this right away, but- back into the ground you go.”

    The Master Tailor made them durable but less than politically correct clothing by dispatching a few animals back to the ground, thereby setting a precedent for spilling blood to cover up people’s transgressions (and other, more noticeable, things). God then kicked man out of the land flowing with milk and honey and the fruit of life, and sent him to try to grow something palatable out of the ground.


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/17MPm4t Permalink

    Posted on November 23, 2013 at 6:18AM 

    Words in Their Natural Habitat: 40 Days of Blogging Day 9: Sabbath →

    Ah, the Sabbath -
    An hour of nagging, followed by
    Two hours of standing, followed by
    An hour of forced fellowship, followed by
    Ah - the Post-Liturgical Nap!
    The rest made for man
    To rest from his resting.
    I have sworn, yea, I have sworn
    And I will not repent:
    My children shall not enter my rest.
    If you think work is hard,
    Try resting in the arms of God;
    His idea of rest is
    "My yoke is easy and my burden light."
    Load-sharing is not lazing,
    Wresting is not resting,
    No one ever kneed a nap,
    And I need a nap.
    I think we rest so well after Liturgy
    Because we’ve got ourselves together-
    It’s hard to rest when one is
    Pulled by every wind,
    But once all are one together
    Then one can prostrate.
    Science can’t tell us why we sleep-
    That is the purview of religion:
    I will lay me down in peace and sleep
    For only you, Lord, keep me safe.

    Permalink

    Posted on November 22, 2013 at 6:01AM 

    Words in Their Natural Habitat: 40 Days of Blogging Day 8: Canned Food →

    We store our treasure in cans like misers
    And hide them in Heaven’s food banks
    We compel them to come in to the Feast
    By making the banquet room go to them
    They have not just been married
    They have not acquired a new field
    They are not having a cow
    They do not have a wedding garment
    Unless we share what we have been given
    And neither also do we
    Unless we share what we have been given
    Bring your tithes of grain
    Bring the caul of the liver
    Bring your winter coat
    Bring the shirt off your back
    Into the storehouse where God keeps
    Everything that has been given away
    And gives himself in exchange
    Food for us to eat like beggars, like children

    Permalink

    Knit Together

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on November 14, 2013 at 7:11AM 

    The Psalmist said we are knit together
    It makes me think of God as a grandma
    Hands always busy, always making things
    For her children’s children, out of love and yarn

    She expects to see us wearing them
    The next time we visit with each other
    Can’t get rid of that - it’s from Grandma
    We’ll wear it, and like it, and say “Thank you”

    It explains why we need each other
    In order to be comfortable and warm
    Wrapped around each other’s necks
    Keeping hands warm and feet beautiful


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/1gNalcD Permalink

    Thanks For Serving

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on November 12, 2013 at 10:11AM 

    We have no record of the first war.
    I don’t mean Cain cudgeling Abel,
    Although all wars are between brothers.
    And I don’t mean “There was war in Heaven”-
    There were no casualties in that war
    Except humans here on earth.

    I mean war, real and inpersonal,
    Where every man is an ascetic,
    Every man seeks the salvation
    Of his own people, and gives up
    His home, his family, his soul.

    All he has left is a good God,
    And he fights for that greater Good.
    All wars are religious, because
    All wars are sacrilegious.
    Just like we rob the poor by our wealth,
    We rob the warrior with our peace.

    We say “Thanks for serving”
    Without joining in the cup,
    And miss that he is offered and offering,
    The soldier is our national Eucharist.

    http://ift.tt/18oolBm


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/182fusC Permalink

    The Little Witch

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on October 31, 2013 at 4:35PM 


    A witch came to the door tonight, and I thought of you
    Streaking through the night to strike me down
    You’re only ugly on the inside, but the warts show through
    I feel the hellish chill when you’re around

    But I opened up the door and I listened for the trick or treat
    Cackling from beneath the witch’s hat
    I felt the moonshine maddening me as she incanted there
    I fell for the little witch’s spell like that

    And there’s something about witches I seem to be familiar with
    Maybe black magic or the still blacker heart
    But when that little witch asked me to go for a broomstick ride
    I knew another spell was going to start

    I should have picked the werewolf or sparkly teenage vamp
    My heart would have been safer with a beast
    I was drawn like a Golem to the little witch’s side
    She is my goddess, I am her priest

    If somehow I get free of her like I once got free of you
    I’ll keep the porch light off on Halloween
    I’ll stay away from witches and keep my broom closeted
    Never by the moonshine my face be seen


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/16Qw1vI Permalink

    Let’s Pretend I Love You

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on October 31, 2013 at 2:12PM 


    Let’s pretend I love you
    Let’s pretend that you love me
    Pretend there’s no one else, and we are free
    I’ll put on my man-suit
    And you dress as my lady
    You’ll get both tricks and treats, I’ll give you me

    Won’t take a lot of acting
    We’ll play it up anyway
    That way nobody will suspect a thing
    I’ll be the US agent
    You be the Russian spy
    Our love will be incognitoing

    Our animal instincts
    Pheromones and all
    Make it hard to mask our attraction
    I’ll be Tarzan the Ape-man
    You Jane make a man of me
    And I will treat you to satisfaction

    Let’s pretend I love you
    Let’s pretend that you love me
    Pretend there’s no one else, and we are free
    I will be the bridegroom
    And you will be my bride
    You’ll get both tricks and treats, I’ll give you me


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/17zQKaQ Permalink

    A Summer’s Twilight Symphony

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on October 29, 2013 at 10:53AM 

    The crickets start, their violins taking up the melody

    The frogs join in with trombone-like resonant harmony

    Bats piccolo above them all with darts and swoops and dives

    Mosquitoes drone the mid-range as they fly to save their lives

    I play the percussion slapping them away from me

    That’s the glorious sound of a Summer’s twilight symphony


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/16IBEvN Permalink

    The Underwear Walker

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on October 25, 2013 at 6:59AM 

    The Underwear Walker is back in the land
    With bare top legs and arms, his robe in his hand
    Whether covered in skin or covered in hair
    It’s clear there just aren’t enough clothes there
    But no one will see him as he walks the hall
    Because no one else is awake - no one at all
    If you happen upon him in the mid of some night
    Don’t be embarrassed or get in a fright
    He’s more scared of you than you are of him
    And you’ll both be happy the lights are so dim


    via Blogger http://ift.tt/1drfRAj Permalink

    Back On Fire

    #IFTTT#Blogger Posted on October 23, 2013 at 2:11PM 

    Like a sleeping dragon from down below
    Roars awake the devil that I know
    Sends a shiver up and down my spine
    Hope the pleasure’s yours because the pain is mine

    Back on fire
    It sets my back on fire
    My back on fire
    My back’s a burning fire

    The whiplash of a flaming Satan’s glee
    Rips by backbone away from me
    Tongues of fire burn there in its place
    Eternal torment begs hopelessly for grace

    Back on fire
    It sets my back on fire
    My back on fire
    My back’s a burning fire

    Hot tongues of flame licking at my neck
    Harbinger of coming days in Heck
    There’s no passage across that damned crack
    Except the fiery pain consuming my whole back

    Back on fire
    It sets my back on fire
    My back on fire
    My back’s a burning fire


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